Picking Up the Slack

April 26, 2019  •  3 Comments

My hope is that I’m the kind of person who picks up the slack when the team needs a hand. But, I’m really not the best person to pick up the slack when other people are sitting on their arses. Sure, I pick up the slack alright, but it isn’t pretty.

I’m working on allowing other people to uphold their end of the bargain. Not easy for a Tidy Tellulah who likes her space as uncluttered as possible. But every single time I complete someone else’s task, when the other person has had ample time to complete it, I rob us both.

When a teammate is in the weeds, I’m happy to jump in and help. But doing someone else’s job because I want things done a certain way or in a certain time-frame is my issue, not the other person’s issue. And the more I try to take over control, the more people will relinquish control. Division of labor is best for all parties—I get to work on my control issues and they get to work on their lazy-ass-procrastinating issues. Yay, everyone wins.

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Comments

Mags
Matt, thanks for making me laugh!
Since this post, I decided I needed to stop folding little people clothes and socks.
One choice can free up hours in a week.
Break open the socks!

Daniel, funny you brought up the timeline because I was thinking about that. Teaching kids to complete a task in a timely manner is important to me, although there are cases when it's time sensitive and times when it's not.
But, because they are ALWAYS asking for things, my 'go to' for everything is, "I'll be happy to (drive you to practice, grab that thing at the store, read to you, pass with you, etc.) as soon as your (homework, chores, clean-up, etc.) is done."
And my tone while saying that is DIRECTLY linked to my self-care.
Thanks so much for your thoughts~
Daniel Shay
I'd put this on, or near, the top of the things I need to be aware of as a parent.
While I completely understand this line “The more I try to take over control, the more people will relinquish control.” - it can be a real struggle for me to accept their process or time line. The act of me doing the job is not my frustration, the frustration I feel is sometimes because my kids didn’t do it, but maybe, if I am being honest, it is me being frustrated with me, that I have let it happen … again!
For me to truly let go, I need to learn how to not only allow for them to do their jobs, but I need to “allow” it without getting frustrated that it isn’t getting done… there is the rub. Thanks Mags!
Matt(non-registered)
Its Friday morning and I found a pair of clean socks. Trying to get around to doing a wash load instead of opening a new bag of socks. Today I’m Oscar to Mags's Felix.
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