“You learn to speak by speaking, to study by studying, to run by running, to work by working….Begin as a mere apprentice and the very power of love will lead you on to become master of the art.”
Francis de Sales

Last week I wrote about being pushed by the pandemic to find solutions to my problems that I’d previously been closed off to. This week, I’d like to share one of those solutions. I know I don’t get a medal for this one Team—normal people have been doing it for years. But me? Not so much. It pains me to confess this to you but, here goes:

I’ve been cooking.

I was raised by an amazing cook, so I know I’m not a ground-level apprentice...I just never took to it the way my brother did. So, planning and prepping food on a weekly and daily basis for six people, with many different food needs, is a huge adjustment for me. But, just as I have to learn to cook by cooking, I also have to learn to change by changing.

The roughest part of change is the beginning. This month, I’ve had so much gratitude for the people who taught me to be incredibly gentle to myself as I go waaaay short on the amount of broccoli I prep and waaaay long on the amount of time I keep chicken in the oven. Yet none of my mistakes have been reasons not to change. And none of my frustrations have been reasons to stay in old defective patterns. 

In this case, the ‘love’ Francis de Sales talks about in the quote above, is the love of self. Taking the time to learn and master what’s best for me. Even if it’s arduous and overwhelming in the beginning. I just keep reminding myself, Practice makes progress. This will get easier. I know I’m not going to come out of this cooking like Master Chef Mom, but I will come out of this knowing that I invested time into changing something that was broken. Doing the same old thing feels like the opposite of loving myself. Today, I chose love.