In our home, this is the time of year when the annual conversations commence around my wanting an artificial Christmas tree, a gas fireplace and an alternative holiday gift exchange between my husband and I. G-Man brought it to my attention that I was requesting a fake tree, a fake fireplace, and fake gift giving. Hmmmm….when you put it that way... Needless to say, that’s a whole lot of fake for someone who tends to prefer the real thing.

What I realized is that while the tree, and the fire, and the exchange are fake, my need for control is so very real. As our children grow and I have to let go of more and more around the choices they make for themselves, it feels really good to find things in my life that I can have more control over. And because I’ve trained myself to control the stuff rather than the people, it makes complete sense that the more I have to let go of managing the children, the more I seek control in other areas of my life.

But this is what’s real about my fake Christmas. I know that it’s real growth for me to express my opinion about customs and traditions when my desires go against social or customary family norms. However, I also really know that these things I’m requesting effect more than just me, which means I have to take into consideration other people’s wishes and opinions. I now have a Real Pause Button (RPB) that reminds me, Is this what’s best for just me or is this what’s best for everyone?

Do you ever feel yourself trudging through ‘traditions’ and thinking to yourself, “Why am I doing this?” I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below (and don’t forget to check back for my reply). And if you enjoy reading this blog, please share it with your friends and encourage them to subscribe.

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